When All You Can Do is Stand

Remind yourself: This is not your battle to lose. It has already been won.

This should be my motto for this entire month. The spiritual attacks have been so apparent and constant that I am physically and emotionally drained. I have never had to put up so much armor than the iron clad shield and vest I have to spiritually strap on every day for the past two weeks.

My faith has been questioned. My relationship with God has been mocked. My character has been put on display and ridiculed. My God has had to fight for me.

I started out trying to fight the good fight and was left feeling defeated. I asked God, "Did I fail you? I feel like I flunked your test." His answer was that it wasn't mine to fail.

I realize that I am not easily understood. I have that CRAZY faith. Yes, I know. People think I'm crazy. He hasn't abandoned me yet. Not even when I didn't know His name. Not even when I felt as though I was alone in my classroom with students disrespecting my love of Him.

It's one of the most difficult things to do: work in a public place where "all people are accepted" but God is not. "You can get fired for that." Wow. Fired for faith.

I already stick out like a sore thumb, now my faith causes me to be an outcast. Well..."I'm going to stand my ground and be an OUTCAST."